I want to say I love Thanksgiving, that it’s my favorite holiday, but…

The last few years were rough.

2020. My mother in the late stages of Alzheimer’s contracted COVID in her locked down nursing home. She came home the Sunday after Thanksgiving for hospice care. We lost her Christmas Eve.  

2021. Grief. The first holiday season without my mother.

2022. Cancer. Exhaustion.

2023. I’m not one to let the little things get me down. But the last few years haven’t been little things. I type in solidarity with those (for whatever reason) in a similar frame of mind—an acknowledgement of holiday heartbreak. If you happen to relate, I see you.

This year, however, I have a clean bill of health. I’m determined to live life. I’m thankful for the body I have and my husband who cooks and works hard so I don’t need to.

Yesterday, I drove to Hobby Lobby and arrived as they opened with a plan. Upon erecting our artificial Christmas tree, two sections did not twinkle. Kody swapped out bulbs and fuses to no avail. We needed new strands of lights. While at the store, I bought Christmas cards. I’m not sure the last time I sent any. Pillows and rugs were discounted 50%. Score. And I bought some ivory candles, a burlap runner, and a holiday garland for the table. For these things, I am thankful. I realize they are unnecessary, but the extra festivity brought comfort and joy.

Once home, I removed the mail from the kitchen table, wiped it down, and pulled out the China. Once upon a time, we had a China cabinet. Now, the dishes remain tucked away in a cupboard unused for years at a time. While pulling out place settings, I realized what I was missing.

I have eight dinner plates of Sandhurst by Noritake and only three salad plates. I have one bread and butter plate. I have six sets of cups and saucers. I wrote all of this down and Googled the pattern. How lovely that I can complete the set started for our 11.25.1989 wedding (Replacements, Ltd.)! One day.

Next, I pulled out the silver. Gorham Golden Ribbon Edge, stainless with gold accent. I have three full sets minus one salad fork. Again, I found replacements on the same site. But would I even know what I was missing if not for imom.com? Lucky for me, His Majesty the King won’t be joining me for dinner. I’m missing butter knives, dessert forks and spoons, salad knives. I’m short on crystal water glasses and wine goblets.

But—for Kody and me? We’re using the China and living life, thankful for the upcoming meal and our humble abode, wishing you all very happy holidays!

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.

Melody Beattie