Three Minutes with Denise

I love new beginnings—the opportunity to start over—to get my mind right. May March bring you joy, fulfillment, perspective, and hope.

A few weeks ago when I stayed with my daughter in Dallas, my bestie Denise let me do some of Lauren’s laundry at her house, which was awesome. Even better, what comes next. Our conversation started like this. “Blah, blah, blah…I’m angry,” I said.

She sat in her chair beside me, listened to my woes, and said, “Do you know where your thoughts are when you’re angry?”

I thought for a moment and said, “The past?”

And she nodded her beautiful face up and down and launched into some sound advice.

I said, “Wait, could I video this?”

Denise coaches golf. And for me, life. She should have her own YouTube channel. Our backstory goes like this—I crashed her birthday party when she turned five. I went uninvited with another friend. That’s how we met. The year was 1975. Later, we shared homerooms—first, second, and third grade. I was always happy to see Denise’s name on the list for my class. Flash forward through twelve years of school, and then I didn’t see her for almost twenty years. We became besties closer to age 40 when we realized we lived within twenty minutes of each other. There’s something about having friends who know exactly where you are from, and I’m just lucky to have a few of those.

39 thoughts on “Three Minutes with Denise

    1. That’s one of my favorite stories. My friend Jennifer up the street also turned five that day. I started at her party and then hopped in the car with her to Denise’s across town. We reunited in OK at our high school reunion. Thanks for giving her a listen, Priscilla!

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  1. I love this! I am still great friends with my elementary school friends-you’re right, there’s something so comforting about being around ppl who knew you from that young age!! 🙂 I always think of my daughter meeting her lifelong friend in a few years too 😊☺️

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    1. We grew up with the same small-town values and then made our way to the city. We just get each other. She met me and my daughter and my daughter’s elementary school friend for dinner during that same trip. So fun! You have lots of great years ahead, BB!

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  2. Beautiful. It’s awesome that we can move up and down our own timelines. But, when I cling to the past or possible future it always obfuscates exactly where I’m clinging from, these present moments. Great post, and great friend.

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    1. Bryan, thank you for reading and listening! Then, in the present—to find the good and be grateful or to make the moment good by choice. I know it’s not always possible, but we do have some choices in our circumstances.

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  3. Wait Crystal, you were serious about taping Denise? That’s awesome! Good luck for us too, as the clip really clicks.

    Having a lifetime friend is an amazing accomplishment, and one not everyone achieves. In my high school senior yearbook, there was a page dedicated to graduates who had been best friends since kindergarten. In our large-ish suburban high school (my class was nearly 700), there were only twelve or fourteen besties. They did exist, but they were rare.

    Sometimes I wondered, in all the years since then, how many of them still are in touch even, let alone still are best friends. No matter the answer, you and Denise are one such pair. What an achievement, and a glowing proof of the quality you both bring out in each other. All the more astounding when considering the two of you crossed state lines, yet your lives still intersect. That’s destiny, my friend!

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    1. A destined friendship, no doubt. Last summer Denise and I went with three more elementary school friends to Telluride, CO. We’re scattered—Austin, Dallas, Houston, CA, and CO, but we manage to stay in touch. The worst part of moving away from Dallas was leaving Denise. I love that she’s just a FaceTime away.

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    1. I’m not an athlete either, which is funny because she went to school on a tennis scholarship and then ended up coaching golf. It’s a life lesson to stay in the zone. Thanks for the view! Hoping you have a really good day, Mel!

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  4. Your friend is very wise and a blessing. I struggle with PTSD, which is an overlapping of the present with the past, so I understand where you are coming from, Crystal. One step at a time, and you’ll find peace. 🙂

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  5. Thank you for sharing!!.. loved the video!.. “No matter the pain or suffering, it is always better if it’s a burden shared by two, instead of a weight carried by one alone”… (Larry “Dutch” Woller)… 🙂

    Until we meet again..
    May love and laughter light your days,
    and warm your heart and home.
    May good and faithful friends be yours,
    wherever you may roam.
    May peace and plenty bless your world
    with joy that long endures.
    May all life’s passing seasons
    bring the best to you and yours!
    (Irish Saying)

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